Children Growing Up

Yesterday was a sad day indeed…OK so maybe I’m being a little melodramatic, but in all honesty I was feeling a little depressed.  Caleb left for a 10-day holiday at his Dad’s in Katherine.  Caleb is only 8 and this is the first time he’s spent an extended period of time with his Dad without Grandma & Poppy there.  It’s also the first time Caleb has flown by himself….I believe Qantas call this an “unaccompanied minor”, which sounds so clinical.  In all the weeks/months leading up to the trip I was fine, I was excited in fact, both for Caleb and myself because I get a break as well.  Even driving to the airport was still fun and exciting, but when it came time to check Caleb in it all went downhill very fast. 

No one gave us clear guidance on what was to be done (as there’s special paperwork and protocol for “unaccompanied minors”), and I’m a person who likes clear guidance in unfamiliar situations.  This made me a little upset, but I soon got over it. 

Then came the time for good-byes, and the way I was feeling you would swear that my baby was going forever…the tears starting welling up in my eyes, so I dropped the sunnies back on to hide the emotion from Caleb, and that dreaded lump in the throat started to develop, making it hard to say what I needed to say without him realising that I was upset.  Finally, the flight attendant leads him down the gangway, having a chat the whole way….he didn’t even turn around to wave good-bye.  I know I just have to accept that he his growing up and knowing Caleb he was probably trying to chat up the lovely flight attendant….but it’s still hard to swallow.

For the rest of the day I was feeling blue….

TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY

Today, Wednesday 19th September is International Talk Like a Pirate Day….

 Skuttle me skippers, I should be sayin “Ahoy ye landlubbers.  Join me in a merry yarn while we be settin’ sail upon the seas….aaaarrrggghh”

 Here in the vast land of Australia ye all can support those wee youngin’s struck down by cancer, as we be usin’ Talk Like A Pirate Day to raise pieces of gold for this worthy cause. If ye be livin’ in the fair state of Queensland and ye be wantin’ to purchase pirate merchandise, be doin’ so from all particpatin’ Queensland Newsagents or Childhood Cancer Support Inc. direct.  Or if ye be makin’ yer life in other states, then ye can be makin’ yer purchase from Kids Cancer Support Australia Foundation Ltd.

Or if ye just want to be spreadin’ the word about Children’s Cancer Awareness or be a squiffy for a day, then start yer swashbucklin’ and learn yeself the lingo.  Then get out thar ye scurvy dog, and find yeself a pretty wench to share yer sweet trade!

BLOG ACTION DAY - 15 OCTOBER 2007

I’m not going to say too much on this topic, other than it’s one day where all bloggers unite and post an entry about the environment, in an effort to increase awareness.  Pete has more to say so check it out….

http://www.dodgypete.com/index.php/2007/09/11/blog-action-day/

Dixie Chicks Shut Up and Sing

My friend Vicky likes a bit of country & western music which I have always found strange, but each to their own I suppose.  She had been telling me about the Dixie Chicks and a DVD they have out, called Shut Up & Sing, and she’s been trying to convince me that it looks really good.  I had my doubts, as I don’t really like the Dixie Chicks music, and I wasn’t shy about letting her know this. 

So, it wasn’t until she sent me a link to the movie trailer that I actually thought, “OK, I should at least watch it before I start saying how terrible it is”, and I must say I was pleasantly surprised. 

It doesn’t appear to be a straight music DVD like I initially thought, but more documentary style where the focus is on the series of events that followed the fateful comment by the girls at one of their concerts, “we’re ashamed that the President of the United States is from Texas”. 

Let it be known that I won’t be rushing out to buy the DVD , but as soon as Vicky gets it, I will be borrowing it, and I will then post an entry with an educated opinion on the full story.

Dodgy pics of not-so-superstars

I was sent an email a few days agao which had a selection of pictures attached, all photoshopped images of what stars would look like if they weren’t stars (there’s some interesting interpretations). They all came from www.planethiltron.com  I won’t post the pics, you can just check out the site for yourself as there are many more that weren’t emailed to me.

Weekend of absolute nothingness

Last week was a long week at work, so by the time the weekend came I didn’t feel like doing too much.  I was looking forward to a couple of days of sitting on the couch doing pretty much nothing.  On friday Pete suggested we try something called the Scoot Game….it’s a scavenger hunt making use of local tourist type attractions such as Southbank Parklands, the Museum et al, all in the interest of the Brisbane River Festival.  Sounds like lots of fun, but also requiring a bit more energy than I had on the weekend.  Hopefully they’ll do run this activity again next year so we can give it a go.

So as it turned out, this weekend was a relaxing one just as I had planned.  We watched plenty of movies, did the housework and had a couple of nanna naps.  The weekend started on Friday night when Pete, Mum & I went to see The Bourne Ultimatum:  Great film….as good as, or possibly even better than the first two.

Saturday consisted of:

Smokin’ Aces, which I really enjoyed.  Lots of twists and turns in the story line, and plenty of shooting action.  Pete and I had a different opinions on this film, but I don’t believe I’m quite as critical as he is, and I also really like this style of film, where there’s plenty of characters introduced throughout the film, and they all cross paths and their  stories interwine by the end.  Plenty of medium-big names in this film, and fun to see if you can pick them all out throughout the movie.

The Machinist - strange but good.  This film is a little dark, and you’ll find it hard to believe that the star is really Christian Bale.  If you’re one of those people who enjoys mainstream blockbusters then this film is probably not for you.

Next…here’s one of the better films I saw over the weekend.  Nicholas Cage co-produced and starred in this one about a Las Vegas magician who can see into the future and is wanted by the FBI to help stop a terrorist attack of nuclear proportions.  The film is shot really well, and sometimes you’ll not be sure whether the scene is really happening or if it’s one of his visions, but that’s all part of the attraction. 

The Contract - John Cusack and Morgan Freeman star in this film about a father (Cusack) and son, who go camping in an attempt to “bond”, and end up taking custody of a wanted assassin (Freeman) and try to return him to the authorities.  Enough action to keep the film going and story line has enough twist in it to keep you watching.  Enjoyable movie, but I would probably only put it about half way down your “to see” list.

Sunday movies then included:

The Fountain - starring Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weisz.  This was a really good film.  I’ll have to steal Pete’s phrase here as he hit the nail right on the head….it’s “spectacularly beautiful”.  There’s a slightly sombre feel to this story but it leaves you with a sense of spiritual elevation by the end.  A definite “must see”!

Last but not least…Robots - Caleb has owned this DVD for a while now, and he’s watched it several times, but Pete andI have only just gotten around to watching it, and as far as animated films go, this one was quite good.  I really like when kids films include a good moral lesson, without trying to hammer it in to them.  The message in this story was subtle enough that I didn’t want to turn it off, the animation was great and plenty of big names…once again, fun to try and pick the voices.  The trashy humour and subtle jokes directed toward adults keeps in interesting for the parents.  Another good film to add to the ever-growing list of animated greats. 

You might be a redneck if….in Mar07

March 2007 rednecks will be nodding their heads in agreeance….

• Your wife’s work uniform has no top
• Your grandmother tried to hit a highway worker with a beer can
• You buy your cough medicine at the liquor store
• You go to the laundromat to pick up women
• Your doorbell is a dog
• Your landscape gardening features cattle skulls
• You think “dinner reservations” means they’ve seen your wife cooking
• You signed your marriage license on the hood of a car
• You traded your truck for a dog
• The grocery store manager has to ask your husband to quit harassing the lobsters
• You invite all your relatives over to see your new ceiling fan
• You test your car battery with your tongue
• You dress to impress no one
• Your honeymoon transportation was Greyhound
• Your wedding pictures have a propane tank in the background
• Your favourite pet is edible
• The diving contest at the family reunion was ruined because your pool went flat
• You idea of “getting lucky” is passing the emissions test
• The last time you went swimming they had to use the boat ramp to get you out of the lake
• You join a record club under a fake name
• Your hood ornament is a duck decoy
• The owner of a restaurant had to ask you to “please move away from the salad bar before you start eating”
• You often find stray animals in your living room
• You pick your friends based on their ownership of jumper cables

Australian Citizenship Application Exam

These are the questions that should be answered by all who want to be Aussies. 

1. LANGUAGE
1-1 Do you understand the meaning, but are unable to explain the origin of, the term “died in the arse”?

1-2 What is a mole?

1-3 Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey?

1-4 Explain the following passage: “In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo.”

2. CUSTOMS
2-1 Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash?

2-2 Complete the following sentences:
a) “If the van’s rockin’ don’t bother …
b) You’re going home in the back of a …
c) Fair suck of the …

2-3 I’ve had a gutful and I can’t be fagged. Discuss

2-4 Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie?

2-5 Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard “up on blocks”? Is his name Keith and does he have a wife called Cheryl?

3. FOOD
3-1 Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming?

3-2 What are the ingredients in a rissole?

3-3 Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam.

3-4 Do you have an Aunty Myrna who is famous for her tuna mornay and other dishes involving a can of cream of celery soup?

3-5 In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else’s beer that has been nicked from a bath full of ice?

3-6 When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people’s meat or are you only allowed to eat your own?

3-7 What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter “b” is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot?

4. CULTURE
4-1 Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots?

4-2 Is it possible to “prang a car” while doing “circle work”?

4-3 Who would you like to crack on to?

4-4 Who is the most Australian: Kevin “Bloody” Wilson, John “True Blue” Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie?

4-5 Is there someone you are only mates with because they own a trailer or have a pool?

4-6 Would you love to have a beer with Duncan? 

Sounds fair dinkum to me…..

You might be a redneck if….in Feb07

February 2007 was a good month for Jeff Foxworthy…..

• The ATM starts laughing when you walk up to it
• You’ve eaten a Big Mac as an “appetiser”
• You do Civil War re-enactments by yourself
• The only time you skydived, it wasn’t on purpose
• Starting your car wakes at least 12 cats
• You always need quarters for something
• You think people with grass in their yards are uppity
• The first time you danced with your wife, it cost you $20
• You’ve been in a fist fight at a yard sale
• Your most romantic moment happened at a drive-thru
• You’ve lived the last ten years with shotgun pellets
• The air freshener in your car was in there when you bought it
• Your car’s anti-theft device is the way it looks
• You’ve woken yourself up while breaking wind
• You own more CBs than CDs
• People have grown weary of telling you that your pants are unzipped
• You frisk everyone at your family reunions
• The place where you vacationed last year won’t allow you to come back this year
• The only “push-up” you know about is sold in the ice cream section
• Three generations of your family are currently working at McDonald’s
• You asked the preacher to repeat the question during your wedding vows
• You have to roll up your sleeve and look at your arm to spell your wife’s name

Signs

Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office:
“Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”  

In a Podiatrist’s office:
“Time wounds all heels.”  

On a Septic Tank Truck:
”Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels.” 

At a Proctologist’s door:
“To expedite your visit please back in.”  

On a Plumber’s truck:
“We repair what your husband fixed.”  

On another Plumber’s truck:
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber!” 

On a Church’s Billboard:
“7 days without God makes one weak.”  

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
“Invite us to your next blowout.”  

At a Towing company:
“We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.”

On an Electrician’s truck:
“Let us remove your shorts!!”

In a Non-smoking Area:
“If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”  

On a Maternity Room door:
“Push. Push. Push.”

At an Optometrist’s Office:
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”

On a Taxidermist’s window:
“We really know our stuff.”

On a Fence:
“Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!”

At a Car Dealership:
“The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.”

Outside a Muffler Shop:
“No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”

In a Veterinarian’s waiting room:
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”

At the Electric Company:
“We would be delighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don’t, you will be.”

In a Restaurant window:
“Don’t stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up.”

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”

At a Propane Filling Station:
“Thank heaven for little grills.”  

Chicago Radiator Shop:
“Best place in town to take a leak”